Game-Changing Truths for Christian Couples: Let’s Dive In!
Ready to spice things up in your marriage? We’re diving into five game-changing truths that every Christian couple needs to keep the love alive and kicking! First off, staying curious about each other is key—because who wants to be bored, right? Then, we’re talking about scheduling those regular date nights because, let’s face it, life gets busy and we need some fun time together! Plus, we’ll chat about the importance of never stopping the pursuit of each other—because romance shouldn’t just be a one-time deal. Communication is also on the list; daily chats are where the magic happens. And finally, we’ll explore love languages, because knowing how your partner best feels loved can totally transform your connection. So, grab your favorite drink, settle in, and let’s get all cozy and chatty about making those marriages thrive!
Curiosity in marriage is like a secret sauce that keeps the love simmering. If you've ever thought you knew everything about your spouse, think again! Jeff and Teresa dive into the first game-changing truth: stay curious. They remind us that even after 33 years of marriage, there's still so much to learn about each other. Asking questions, sharing dreams, and discussing plans can breathe life into any long-term relationship. They emphasize the importance of scheduling regular date nights because let's be real—marriage needs a little fun and intentionality. Date nights aren’t just about getting dressed up; it’s about reconnecting and letting your spouse know they matter. They also touch on the idea of never stopping the pursuit. Just because the wedding bells have rung doesn’t mean the chasing should stop! Keeping the spark alive takes effort, and they share some hilarious anecdotes about how to keep that love alive with words, affection, and thoughtful gestures. Communication is another key ingredient—they advocate for daily, purposeful conversations to foster intimacy and prevent resentment from creeping in. Lastly, they explore love languages, and how understanding your spouse’s unique way of feeling loved can transform your connection. It’s all about knowing how to love your partner in the way they need most. So grab your spouse, tune in, and get ready to take those notes!
Takeaways:
- Staying curious about each other is key to keeping the spark alive in marriage.
- Regular date nights are essential for nurturing your bond and connection as a couple.
- Never stop pursuing each other; keep that romantic flame burning bright, just like in the early days.
- Intentional daily communication helps deepen your connection and understanding of each other.
- Understanding your spouse's love language can transform how you express love and affection in your marriage.
- Investing in your marriage with fun activities and deeper conversations leads to a happier, more fulfilling relationship.
Links referenced in this episode:
Companies mentioned in this episode:
- Inspiring Marriages
- Stronger Marriages
- 5lovelanguages.com
Transcript
Christian couples.
Speaker A:Whether you're married, engaged or praying for the right person, this episode is one you don't want to miss.
Speaker A:If you've ever said I wish I knew this before saying I do, you're not alone.
Speaker A:Marriage is beautiful, but let's be real.
Speaker A:It comes with lessons that we often learn the hard way.
Speaker B:But what if you could skip the years of struggle?
Speaker B:What if you could build a strong Christ centered marriage without the heartbreak, miscommunication or missed opportunities to connect?
Speaker A:Today we are sharing five game changing truths that every Christian couple needs to embrace to keep their marriage strong, intimate and deeply connected in faith.
Speaker A:So you won't have to say I wish I knew this sooner.
Speaker B:Welcome to the Inspiring Marriages Podcast.
Speaker B:We are Jeff and Teresa Fields.
Speaker A:We have been happily married for 33 years.
Speaker A:Along the way, we've been blessed with three incredible grown children, a fantastic sudden love, and the most precious grandbaby you you could imagine.
Speaker B:Get ready to be inspired as we open up about our journey.
Speaker B:Our mission is to ignite a spark in couples everywhere.
Speaker A:We're all about nurturing deep friendships and cultivating marriages that thrive in every way spiritually, emotionally, romantically and physically.
Speaker A:Join us on this incredible adventure.
Speaker B:Let me do that one.
Speaker B:Be sure to check out our website at inspiring marriages.net Dive into all our previous episodes with detailed show notes that enrich your listening experience.
Speaker A:Plus scroll down to find our Keep in Touch section where you can sign up and receive our latest offerings at absolutely free.
Speaker A:Don't miss out on the inspiration.
Speaker A:Visit us today.
Speaker A:Teresa Today we are sharing five game changing truths that every couple needs to embrace.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:So the first one we're going to share with you is to stay curious about each other.
Speaker B:So the moment we stop learning about our spouse is the moment we start drifting apart.
Speaker B:Even after years of marriage, your partner is still growing, maturing and experiencing life in new ways.
Speaker A: Proverbs: Speaker A:Their ears are open for knowledge.
Speaker A:Keep asking questions.
Speaker A:Keep uncovering their dreams, fears and joys.
Speaker A:Because when curiosity is alive, intimacy thrives.
Speaker A:So Teresa, how can a couple stay curious about each other?
Speaker B:Well, I think that really says it so well.
Speaker B:Keep asking questions.
Speaker B:Don't just assume that you know your spouse so well that there's nothing more to learn.
Speaker B:You know, ask them how they think about something or what they're feeling about something or what they what they want to do.
Speaker B:Anything different that they want to do, whether it's, you know, the things you enjoy together or the way you're parenting or something.
Speaker B:With finances, it's.
Speaker B:There's always room for growth and discovery.
Speaker B:So staying curious is a great way to do that.
Speaker A:I think it's really, really, really good for a couple to put aside some time every year to talk about the highlights of the year, talk about what happened, things that you would have liked to have done differently, and also talk about your plans for the upcoming year.
Speaker A:Talk about the things that you want to do together as a couple.
Speaker A:Talk about your goals, talk about your dreams.
Speaker A:Keep, always keep in mind, always have a place that, where you want to take your faith higher.
Speaker A:Always be aspiring higher than.
Speaker A:Than you are.
Speaker A:Where is deeper level of.
Speaker A:Of intimacy?
Speaker A:Just more connection and just have just developed plans to learn about each other and to communicate.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:That's so good.
Speaker A:So what kind of questions can couples ask each other?
Speaker B:Well, like you said, was there anything that you would have liked to have done differently?
Speaker A:That's a good question.
Speaker B:Last year.
Speaker B:Yeah, like, did we not have enough time to ourselves, like date nights or just getting away for a weekend or overnight?
Speaker B:Because I know with kids that can be more difficult to bring that about.
Speaker B:But it could be that looking back, you can say, I wish we had had more time away or just more regular date nights or more time just to have conversation.
Speaker B:So, you know, what can we change in our schedules?
Speaker B:What can we plan?
Speaker B:Like you said, plan for the upcoming year.
Speaker B:How can we plan for this better so that we'll feel more satisfied with our relationship and keep growing closer to each other?
Speaker A:Oh, I like that.
Speaker A:That's.
Speaker A:That's so good.
Speaker A:So number two, we need to schedule regular date nights.
Speaker A:Marriage just doesn't work out on its own.
Speaker A:It requires intentional investment and one simple but powerful way to protect your connection.
Speaker A:Date nights.
Speaker B:That's so good.
Speaker B:We know we've really enjoyed our date nights for years now.
Speaker B:Whether it's a fancy dinner or a simple coffee run, prioritizing one on one time tells your spouse you matter.
Speaker B:Our love matters.
Speaker A:Ecclesiastes 99 NIV says, Enjoy life with your wife whom you love.
Speaker A:Now, date nights aren't just about fun, is it, Teresa?
Speaker A:It's also about strengthening your bond in the everyday moments.
Speaker A:So we had an interesting comment this past week where we posted a post by the Stronger Marriages page and had the 2:2:2 rule.
Speaker A:It's like every two weeks go out on a date.
Speaker A:Every two months go overnight somewhere.
Speaker A:And every.
Speaker A:No, two times a year go overnight somewhere.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:And every two years go on a multiple night Trip.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:And we had a, A listener who said, well, why, what if you don't have the money to do that?
Speaker A:There's still ways to connect.
Speaker A:You can have a no device night.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:That's where you don't have any devices, you don't have any Internet on.
Speaker A:You're not checking your phone, you're not checking anything.
Speaker A:And you can connect that way.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:That's really pushing.
Speaker A:And you can.
Speaker A:Or if you want to have discussion time and then watch.
Speaker A:Make popcorn and watch a movie.
Speaker A:I always thought I was thinking about this today.
Speaker A:Go back and if it's.
Speaker A:Well, if it's not R, or worse, go back and watch your first movie you ever watched together.
Speaker A:When you're dating, that's always fun.
Speaker B:It does bring back a lot of memories, doesn't it?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Or no.
Speaker A:You can make sandwiches and go to a park or you can go on a drive.
Speaker A:If you live somewhere, they have a scenic drive.
Speaker A:Turn off the radio.
Speaker A:You can use your phone for navigation.
Speaker A:But don't be, don't be sitting there.
Speaker A:Who's ever not the one not driving, don't be sitting there just scrolling on your phone the whole time.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Have conversation.
Speaker A:Go look at lakes, or you can look at leaves or trees or just all kinds of things you can do.
Speaker A:That isn't a big budget item.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:That's exactly right.
Speaker A:Now I think number three is a big one.
Speaker A:This may be the biggest one yet.
Speaker A:Never stop pursuing each other.
Speaker A:Correct me if I'm wrong.
Speaker A:So there's so much emphasis on the wedding day.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:There is so much energy put into it and so much goes on.
Speaker A:It takes some people plan a year to put their wedding together or maybe multiple years to put their wedding together.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:And there's just so much effort that when it's over, you can just relax and go on to cruise control or automatic pilot, which is never a good idea.
Speaker B:No.
Speaker B:No.
Speaker A:So, you know, the pattern is that the husband pursues the wife pursues the woman he wants to.
Speaker A:To marry and, and woos her.
Speaker A:And you know, you always try to look your.
Speaker A:Your best.
Speaker A:You always try to be neat, you know, have good breath.
Speaker A:And the lady always spruces up for the date.
Speaker A:Something special or with her hair or doing something to present herself the best she can.
Speaker A:She wants to be the best she can be, and he wants to be the best he can be.
Speaker A:But sometimes it's not all the time, but sometimes when that wedding day is over, you kind of just relax and you stop doing the same the things you did when you were dating, you don't quite.
Speaker A:My hair is like.
Speaker A:It is.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker A:My clothes.
Speaker A:I won't change my clothes.
Speaker A:And we're just going.
Speaker A:We're just going over to McDonald's.
Speaker A:I'm not going to put on a clean shirt.
Speaker A:You know, and so.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker B:You just kind of lower the standards for everything because it's comfortable.
Speaker B:But like you said, that's not pursuing each other the way you did when you were dating or when it was like you had all these exciting things ahead of you.
Speaker B:Well, you still have a lot of exciting things ahead of you if you are pursuing each other, if you're making your marriage a priority.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:What does the Bible say about the man should leave his father and his mother and cleave unto his wife like glue and pursue that cleavers pursue and stick to adhere, and they shall become one flesh.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:I really like this verse in Song of Solomon, chapter 8, verse 7.
Speaker B:It says, Many waters cannot quench love, nor will rivers overflow it.
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:So no matter what happens in the world when you're.
Speaker A:Nothing should be affecting your love, you keep pursuing your spouse.
Speaker A:Words, affection, action.
Speaker A:And watch how your marriage flourishes.
Speaker A:If you brought her flowers when you're dating, bring her flowers when you're married.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:If you wore something special on your date, wear something special on your date.
Speaker A:If you got your car washed before you took your date out on a date, get your car washed before you take your wife out on a date.
Speaker B:That's good.
Speaker A:Keep your car clean.
Speaker A:It's just always be about pursuing your spouse.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:And you said, you know, pursue your spouse with your words.
Speaker B:I really like that.
Speaker B:I mean, we are going to be affectionate.
Speaker B:Hopefully we're being intentional about it.
Speaker B:But words, I think a lot of times we let that slip because familiarity can make you just want to say whatever.
Speaker A:That is a good point.
Speaker B:So we're not making an effort to choose our words well and.
Speaker B:And speak highly of our spouse and speak like for the wife to speak in ways that show honor to her husband, instead of cutting remarks or, you know, joking about things that actually kind of hurt.
Speaker B:Hurt him, even though he may not admit it or show it.
Speaker B:Women have to be careful with their words because it really can impact your husband.
Speaker B:Especially if words of affirmation is love language, you really need to be speaking words of affirmation.
Speaker A:Oh, that is so good, Teresa.
Speaker A:I think we had a podcast called One Time Sarcasm no More.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker B:Yes.
Speaker A:There is no room in your Marriage for sarcasm or any words of that demean.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Or belittle.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:Or make fun of your spouse.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:That's so true.
Speaker A:Number four, you have to communicate daily on purpose.
Speaker A:One of our main Friendship Builder is 30 minutes of connect time every day.
Speaker A:And we also, another marriage builder was closely tied to that is pray with and pray over your spouse.
Speaker A:So communication isn't just about talking, it's about connecting.
Speaker A:So it really doesn't really matter what you talk about, but you need to connect.
Speaker A:Guys, you won't believe it, but your wife is really sincerely interested in your day.
Speaker A:You're like, I didn't do anything.
Speaker A:She's really interested in your day.
Speaker A:And it just builds her up when you communicate to her.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:And taking the communication to deeper levels than just like you said, small talk or, you know, we don't want to just talk about what the kids do, what happened, you know, and who got in trouble and that kind of thing.
Speaker B:You got to get down to the personal things to talk about.
Speaker B:You know, if you're stressed about something, if you have need for something, if you just want to spend time together and just, you know, embrace for a while, just snuggle, you know, you need to be sharing, sharing your hearts with each other and get deeper in your communication.
Speaker B:That's one of the beautiful things about marriage.
Speaker B:We can do that and it's totally fine with God for us to be close, to be intimate, to be very affectionate with each other.
Speaker B:And that's such a beautiful thing in marriage.
Speaker B:We're free to do that and don't pull back on that just because, oh, yeah, it's you again.
Speaker B:You don't want to be familiar and take each other for granted, but really make the most of that communication time.
Speaker A:Oh, that is so good.
Speaker A:And there's a reason why USA Today was a very popular newspaper in hotels and with men, because it just contained headlines.
Speaker A:There's no in depth in investigative reporter reports or editorials.
Speaker A:It's very surface level.
Speaker A:I know, guys, you're like, ah, I don't know how to do that.
Speaker A:It's hard for me to do that.
Speaker A:But you know, your wife will help you.
Speaker A:And if you want a free listing of questions that husbands and wives can use to open up those doors of communication, just send us an email@inspiringmarriages.net and just ask for questions and we'll send you a link where you can download that PDF.
Speaker A:These are just questions that husbands and wives can ask each other to just start the ball rolling, rolling.
Speaker A:And you just, you don't know where it might lead.
Speaker A:You might be talking for hours.
Speaker B:Right, right.
Speaker A:That will bless your wife, I tell you.
Speaker B:Yes, that's true.
Speaker A:Got to check in, you got to pray together.
Speaker A:You got to tell your spouse what's on your mind before resentment builds.
Speaker A:You just can't just deal with it.
Speaker A:You got to talk.
Speaker B:Yes, talking really helps a lot.
Speaker B:And sometimes you don't realize you've had resentment about something until you start talking about it.
Speaker B:You kind of feel that anger rising up, like, you know, this has happened so many times and I'm upset about it and it's happening again, you know, but if you can talk about it, you can start sharing expectations and maybe expectations that weren't fulfilled.
Speaker B:So that, I mean, this could be in any area of your marriage, your relationship, but it really helps to just express it in a non threatening way and a non threatening environment.
Speaker B:You're just having conversation, you know, you're not going to, you're not using this to, you know, drop an A bomb on your, on your spouse.
Speaker B:You know, try to, you know, have an explosive situation.
Speaker B:You just need to talk before something builds up into a huge issue.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:James 1:19 reminds us, Be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.
Speaker A:When you commit to intentional communication, you, you create a safe place where love, trust and faith flourish.
Speaker A:Now number five, Teresa, this is a big one.
Speaker B:Yes, we love.
Speaker A:It's almost as big as never stop pursuing your spouse.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:Study your spouse's love language.
Speaker B:Wow.
Speaker B:This is a great lesson in marriage.
Speaker B:We discovered this many years ago, but we found it to be very helpful because if you don't know that your spouse has a certain way that they receive love that really means the most to them, they probably developed this from childhood, you know, being a little child and something that just meant love to them and was comforting, encouraging to them.
Speaker B:You need to know how your spouse receives love.
Speaker B:So your spouse might love be loved through words, or maybe your spouse is craving quality time.
Speaker B:It's, it can be different for each person.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:The five love languages are act of service, words of affirmation, time, gifts, and touch.
Speaker A:And those are in no particular order.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:And you can have a combination of those, but there's usually one that stands out the most.
Speaker A:Yeah, right.
Speaker A:You can have several of those that you feel love, but there's usually one that's one and two that really primary.
Speaker A: First Corinthians: Speaker A:So you go to 5lovelanguages.com that's the number 5lovelanguages.com and there you can find, test and you can fill out a survey and it'll just tell you what your, what your tendency is.
Speaker A:You got to take it with a grain of salt.
Speaker A:But you know, you're not locked in stone, you know.
Speaker A:So loving on purpose means studying your spouse.
Speaker A:Become a student of your spouse.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:Study them.
Speaker A:Study them like you were studying the law or study in medicine.
Speaker A:Study them and study their love language.
Speaker B:I think you'd be able to tell, you know, if they can't tell you, I think you'll be able to tell when you see how it impacts them.
Speaker B:When you start acting in some of these love languages.
Speaker B:I mean, if it's gifts and you never usually give gifts to your spouse and you start doing that and you see, wow, they really felt love.
Speaker B:They really felt appreciated.
Speaker B:They really felt blessed by that.
Speaker B:Okay, I think their love language might be gifts.
Speaker B:I'm going to keep trying this and, and, and just do that to minister to them.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker B:Doesn't have to be anything major or expensive, but just little thoughtful things.
Speaker A:That's so good.
Speaker A:When you minister to your spouse in their love language, you're like really showing up in ways that truly fill their heart.
Speaker B:Mm.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:Now, if any of these truths resonated with you, send us an email@inspiringmarriagest.net and let us know which one hit home the most.
Speaker A:Like subscribe and share so more Christian couples can strengthen their relationship with faith, love, and wisdom.
Speaker A:Let's commit to thriving marriages together.
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Speaker A:Just search for Inspiring Marriages and all the platforms.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker A:If you need prayer, we would love to pray for you.
Speaker A:We pray for all our.
Speaker A:We pray for our subscribers.
Speaker A:But if you need prayer, inspiring marriages t.net is how you get in touch with us.
Speaker A:We are not counselors because that would not be fair to you to long distance counsel.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:But we would.
Speaker A:We would pray.
Speaker A:We will pray for you.
Speaker A:So until next time, remember, husband and wife are friends for life.
